Lie #2 – He was cheating on Me! (Part 2)

I had to break this one into two parts, as it was becoming very…very long. Here’s the second installment.

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The Golden Years of Death

2015 and 2016 were years of great change.  I started focusing on doing all the things she liked to do…with her.  I started Facebooking.  I started going to the gym with her.  I did meal planning and meal prepping for both of us.  We watched all the shows together. I built us a theater in the garage.  We became inseparable. Here are some highlights from those years:

Here’s the trajectory of my health at the time.

Everything seemed right.  I was putting 100% into our relationship.  She seemed happy.  She claimed she was happy. And I was happy making her happy. Our sex life was back on point with zero issues.  My health was right. We bought cutesy lover’s games.  Went on trips. Had a blast.

Here’s a few snapshots of our life at that time. There were thousands, but this isn’t a book of memories. And our sex life? There are no complaints there… there are thousands of pieces of evidence from that as well, since we’d discovered Amanda liked cameras; but those will not be posted.

It seems everything was fixed. But then the old monster raised itself back up, if it had ever gone away to begin with… her love of attention. And here is how it started: Facebook (or more aptly, how I discovered it had never gone away.)

Being as I was now a social media user, I saw ads and things about “30 day lover’s challenge”; “10 Ways to Say I love you without words”… just tons of this spammy click-bait stuff, no doubt driven by my google searches to further my mission and give her the best relationship I could.  These things put it into my head that I was still not doing enough, maybe, and perhaps I was behind the curve on how I should be treating my wife and I was too old fashioned… not the modern man with promposals and rose petals.   So when she approached me with a “secret group for married couples” that she had joined… I felt it was just another one of these cutesy things women like to do.  So I jumped in without reservation.

To this day I don’t understand any of these things.  But I always assumed that as a member of the opposite sex, she had needs and goals that I was too dumb to understand.

For a month, maybe two, it went smashingly well.  In this group you were supposed to brag on your s.o.; they had challenges like “post a love letter to you wife for everyone to see”

Well, very quickly… it devolved.  More and more, the group turned into a forum where married couples would flirt across the aisles.  I ignored this stuff.  But then she started to respond to it, almost breathlessly and giddily. There was this guy… Barry Horton, that she could not seem to ignore. 

I do wish I had trusted her less and kept more. There are many thousands of things I should have screenshotted, or not lost… but I never, for one second… as stupid as it may seem, never thought I would need such things. I trusted this woman fully. This is all I could find from that period, and I don’t even know this guy… this was discovered later.

[The pictures above is her flirting hard with some guy on facebook. And dropping a pic. She was fishing hard. There was always, always a guy… guys… in the woodwork, somewhere]

At that time, we had a discussion about the Barry Horton thing.  Basically a fight.  My question was, if everything was going right, why in the world did she need to flirt with guys on facebook?

Her answer… per the usual was “I like the attention. But I can change” This was what? The third? Fourth time I’d been through this cycle with her.

At this point, I began to think… she has an issue.  An illness.  An incurable addiction.  We have the same issues cropping up, no matter how good, or bad the marriage is.  I am giving 100% of my time, effort, and energy to trying to make her happy.  Supposedly she is happy.  But… what heroin addict will ever say no to more heroin?  It is just that acute.

So at this point I’m going to skip forward in time.  We will say… I made some great sacrifices and adjustments, doing myself an inordinate amount of damage for a couple of more years, earning a badge of eternal shame… and causing myself some real pain to provide her a sandbox to play in.

But again… everything is worth it right?  Now she’s happy.  Now she won’t cheat. Now our family won’t blow up and I won’t lose my kids. They won’t grow up in a broken home.

Right?

Wrong. Very, very wrong.

Lets skip forward and touch on 2018.

The Years of the Doctor

Here we were in 2018.  On her birthday.  Happy?

Would you believe she went to the movies with a Doctor she worked with at St. Dominic earlier that day?  I’ve seen their tickets…

But I didn’t know any of that.  I would not find out until we were already divorcing.  And that story is coming.  But let me tell you how 2018 and 2019 went. 

During 2018, she got wilder and wilder. Wanted to party all of the time. Wanted to hang out with these three married couples all of the time, exclusively.   Cassie and Dustin.  Scarlet and Brian.  Justin and Danielle.   And every time she hung out with these people, something terrible would happen.  Wanted to go to these…parties… and get up to all sorts of wild, drunken mischief…

She blamed it on alcohol. At first, I was ok with hanging out with Cassie and Dustin, Justin and Danielle.   But she made things so awful that I just couldn’t stand it. As a matter of fact, we met Justin and Danielle first, and she made that so awful that we hung out with Cassie and Dustin just to replace them with some other people she would like… hoping it would NOT go awful.

Truth is, that became so much worse.

Don’t get me wrong, they’re nice people and I’m not going to reveal their full names.  But Amanda Gayle Carter in the mix made it pure hell.

No matter how many agreements we made, she would get drunk and break them.  No matter how I wanted to be, or what boundaries I had, or what I was comfortable with… it was of no consequence. But, me being me, I wrote her a blank check on her behavior and instead blamed the friends.

And I’ll tell you now, until you know what sort of things she was about… you’ll have to just trust me. Boundaries, comfort, agreements… were very important in these instances.

No matter what prospective friends I found that were more similar to us, she simply would not gel the same way.  It was all Justin/Danielle, Dustin/Cassie, Scarlet/Brian… and I was browbeaten, insulted, pressured and threatened into hanging out with them and getting along. (phrases such as “see David, that’s why nobody likes you. You’re no fun”

Bending myself to near breaking… to not offend her friends; or rather to not give her the idea that I had offended them…

And if I were to tell you what hanging out with friends and Amanda entailed… but anyways; not today.

Here’s a picture of the majority of the crowd. Note my body language. I really don’t want to be there. There was a reason why I was there, and it was not by choice. But that’ll be in some other post or story. The wild “Amanda party” later, I will reserve describing for another day. On another note here, Justin and Danielle went home after this photo and did not attend.

When the forbidden story comes out… you will remember these names.  

She even tricked me into a ski trip one time with JD and DC, where everything was supposed to be tame and normal; and it immediately went nuts as soon as I was locked into someone else’s car without an escape and halfway to Pennsylvania with her completely browbeating me into consigning myself to a crazy party. I had told her for three months I did not want to go on some wild trip, and she eventually connived me with “It’s going to be a friends and family thing. Not wild at all.” and I eventually caved. It was by NO means tame.

We fought on that trip. We fought after that trip.

She also pulled the same trick on a boat ride in the Reservoir with Dustin and Cassie.  Then again later she tried to trick me into a Game of Thrones bus bar crawl with Scarlet and Brian…  always trying to force me to hang out with people…which is ok, but then turning into craziness…which was not ok. What’s worse, is the three things were inescapable situations. Tricking me into a situation I couldn’t get out of.

But these stories… these are the ones I’ve promised not to tell.  The wild parties…

I do hate it that D&C / J&D are a part of this. They weren’t bad to me while it was a thing, simply short on boundaries and incited by Amanda. But it was all instrumental. Particularly the D&C dynamic, as she continued to spend time with them after the separation, and no doubt… well… nevermind.

Oh, and there was a definite Dustin thing that I still haven’t figured out… she was texting him in KIK. I saw it, and tried to read the message. She freaked out, and would not let me see the phone. Then, right in front of me, she deleted the messages. And said “Cassie has a medical problem and I can’t betray trust”

Yeeeah. Right. But anyways…

Scarlet and Brian, for many…many reasons… I just don’t care.

Moving on.. Here’s the type of positions she’d often put me in…

She told me once on the way to Shucker’s after she’d browbeaten, guilted and threatened me in order to hang out with Scarlet and Brian (which I absolutely hated doing because of one truly awful cruise to hell in 2017 which the below pictured texts reference, and prior to that there are other reasons we will eventually get to… somewhere in these posts….as to why I wanted limited exposure to these guys even before the cruise) that  the reason she acted inappropriately was because of the liquor.  She directly told me “look.  If I get more than two drinks, tap me on the elbow and remind me.”  So I agreed.  I hoped it would not go south, I felt confident it would not go south.

I trusted her. And I was wrong. It definitely went south.

We get there, and everything’s fine for a while.  She starts to order a third drink.  I tap her on the arm.

And wow.  She has a complete meltdown on me about controlling her.  Trying to control her.  Trying to keep her from having a good time.  Lots of this.

I think she did it because she wanted these people to see me “controlling” her… because at this time, she’d already been seeing the doctor for a year and was hoping to start building an out for her marriage. A ‘He’s controlling, and I have the proof!’ line of defense to justify bailing.

She was very good at staging, and only got better with time.

But again, I didn’t know that yet.  To me, it was simply insane.

Now further on into the evening, I went to the bathroom.  When I came back everyone was gone.  Those three were on the dancefloor, and Brian had a big handful of Amanda’s backside.  I forcibly removed his hand.  Amanda got angry; said I didn’t see what I thought I saw.  I told her that doesn’t work… I had to physically remove his hand!  Then she said “I just didn’t notice, I’ve been drinking”

That didn’t work, it’s impossible, he had a grip going and it required force… and she’d only had the three drinks.  So then she simply gets extremely angry and yells at me “It’s cause you’re ALWAYS there!!!” And stormed off  To this day, I don’t know what that means. It is complete craziness, but highly representative of what I dealt with regularly… If she was cornered in the wrong, things went nonsensical and would be shut down.

Did we have “relationship issues” because of it? In my mind, no. Because we would talk about it later, seek compromises, I would try to further understand her and bend a little more. It was not a fight and a deteriorating element. But good lord, it hurt like hell…every. single. time.

The price of doing business, the mission was to give her everything she needs, right? So we made our promises to each other… our compromises – me to try to come more her way or find an alternate route, and her to stop trying to bend me until I broke.

These scenarios would continue to repeat though. It was a merry go round. She did not compromise, only pay lip service to it.

Now here’s where I’ll drop a little bit of… stuff, in pictures, about that “friendship” she has with those guys,  that still exists.  These are people she goes on trips with, often with just her and them….people she brings her newest boyfriends around! It is extremely broken and messed up.  And when I can finally be free to tell the rest of the story…you will understand.

Here’s a picture and some text messages between Scarlet and Amanda and a picture from a group chat of them and Brian with those two kissing, all in no particular order but all in the same conversation, and about that same time (actually in 2017). This should be more than enough hints. The blue text is Amanda.

It was not a thing I wanted to be in.  That’s all I will say for now. But I will say, that no matter what issues there were hanging out with Scarlet and Brian, no matter how it made me feel… she still managed to browbeat, coerce, and threaten me into being around them.  I was told that I was an as*hole and controlling if I did not.  It was unfair to her that I didn’t want to… on and on, down to “I’ll just go alone then!!!” And the forcing worked. I would give in. I should not have, as it was all for naught.

At least 4 times between 2017 and 2019 she put me in it with these guys. When the full story is out… this fact will chill your marrow.   

Controlling, indeed.  Her idea of controlling is very loose.  In her world, you will not only do as she wants, but you will like it.  Any disagreement or sign of dislike, anything other than applause and thumbs up… and you will be branded as controlling, at some point or another.

So anyway, 2018 is spent in a blur.  She gets wilder and wilder.  Things get more and more tense in my own head. It was extremely rough on me, but I took it as “growth”, getting “on the same page”, “learning what she needs”.  Doing what I had to do to make her happy, so she wouldn’t cheat. But I will repeat, it was tough…

Ordinarily, I do not drink.  But it was during these wild days that I did drink on several occasions just to keep up with her.  That was a mistake.

I assigned all this wildness to her having spent her teen years as a mother, and having missed that stage of life. Sort of a midlife crisis, retaking what she’d missed.  I gave her a get out of jail free card.  This was a mistake.  

I did not know she had a boyfriend in the background who was also into the sorts of wild things she was up to and was instigating in the background and giving her that “thumbs up”

Then weird things started to happen.

We go on a cruise with the kids.  By this time she’s returned to school, which is a subject on its own… 

So we go on this cruise and when we get there, she confines herself to the room every night and goes to sleep early.  She tells me that the reason is because she has to study.  But then she tells me “go, have fun.  It’s not fair to you that I can’t do anything.  And if you meet a woman, do whatever and don’t worry about it.  I’m not jealous, at least I know where you put your head at night”

I look at her like a monkey just climbed out of her left ear.  I assure her that will NOT happen… thinking she’s joking or testing me. Then I go and spend the time sipping a beer with this old guy at the casino bar listening to him tell stories about when he used to manage the New York Mets.  I do talk to a number of people at the bar; but that’s that.

Turns out later, that she and her married, doctor boyfriend had an agreement on what she could and could not do on the cruise.  But I still did not know that.  At that time, I still did not know he existed.

Then we have another weird issue.  There’s a restaurant in town where the counter girl knows my name and order…even though I might eat there once every 4-6 months and I just get takeout.  I joke she’s a stalker, she jokes the girl has a crush on me.  Amanda tells me I should talk to her… see what happens.

NO and NO. That’s my response.

We roll on into 2019-2020. 

Again, a weird issue.  One day I wake up a little late and I go to work in wrinkled pants.  I tell Amanda later that “wow, I look like I crawled out of a dumpster.  Good thing there’s nobody there to impress”

She responds with “well David… maybe someday there will be!”

I’m again looking at her like she’s grown a third eye.

Things come to a head after the Imagine Dragon’s concert we attended at the Brandon amphitheater.  I paid for $400 seats so she could see it. I don’t remember what brought it up, but on the ride home we have a “come to Jesus” discussion.  Just exactly what the heck is she trying to do??

Her response was “David, I’m not happy.  I can’t be happy unless we do our own thing”

Shoe was dropped.  I was shocked.

I stew over this a few days. I can’t believe she’s serious.  We have talks.  She maintains the line “I can’t be happy unless we do our own thing”  There is a lot in this small sentence.  I can’t be happy unless…

This was the true death knell.  The mission to keep my wife happy at all reasonable costs had just gotten very, very expensive.

Now, during 2018 and 2019 she figured out a trick I’m susceptible to.  She tells me something crazy in person.  By voice.  I stew over it.  I have trouble with emotionally charged conversations so I answer in text.  She trapped me a whole lot with this trick, and this was no exception.  I find out later she has a strategy of passing screenshots.  And she is adept at setting up situations, such as the Shucker’s incident, and as you’ll see in some later posts.

But oh well…

So I tell her… “we have kids and a life.  We can do this since you apparently have to do it ‘to be happy’, but we have to have rules”

She freaked out about the rules concept.  “David you’re not going to control what I do!!!!”

She comes back to me two days later and says she wants to drop the whole thing, it’s a mistake.

I’m stewing on what she said.  “I CAN’T be happy unless…”

I text her that it’s full speed ahead.  I can’t have her coming to me later breaking our family to bits because she can’t be happy otherwise.  I had a strategy. The idea of freedom might be the secret. If I tell her no, I was certain she would cheat. But if I told her yes, I thought the concept would rot on the vine, that she’d not go through with it.  I thought it would be like when…I don’t know… maybe like a horse that kicks and whinnies at the fence, but when you open the gate, will stand there frozen; too nervous to bolt.

I knew I wouldn’t.  It’s exceedingly unnatural and wrong. 

I figured she’d come to her senses.  So like drax in guardians of the galaxy, I became very very still.  I made no motions towards “doing my own thing.”  I waited.  For three months, I was still and silent. The Imagine Dragon’s concert was in July, if I’m not mistaken. So I waited until October, before doing anything… and as you will see… I did it, because it was then “a thing”

In hindsight, I am glad I conceded, or held up her idea to some degree.  Otherwise, the cheating she was doing secretly would have continued until she could convince him to leave his wife. 

So clearing that hurdle brought things rapidly to a close… because the point of “doing our own thing” was so she could be less secretive about her affair.  But again, I did not know that.

With me being ignorant of the true score, and giving her the go-ahead…Did she wait? Well… No, and definitely NO.  In my line of sight, she started texting this guy TJ who lived down around Hattiesburg. And he was the target, largely because of my “rules”. I did not want to see our family broken, so I’d set in place at the beginning, that if we were to do something, it could not be with anyone local.  I know what they were texting but I won’t talk about that here, it’s part of the forbidden story.  And I didn’t know it, but she was STILL seeing the secret married doctor.

I remained very still even then….Until she put TJ on the calendar for a meetup. She’d put him on the calendar for September 8th.  At that point, it was clear, everything was broken.  So I went on dating apps.

The End and Revelations

I know this has been a long winding read, and I’m sorry.  I didn’t set the story, I just put it down as it was.   But we are getting close to the end. We’re now about mid way into 2020.

Alright, so now… we’re “doing our own thing.”  She’s been texting tj in KIK messenger.  She’s now seeing this guy Jeff AND she hasn’t stopped with the Doctor, she’s also dating several other guys.  One mechanical engineer who apparently saw her stretch marks on the first date? (I can’t comment much on that, other than I was shocked and appalled, but she said it was because he was “tickling her” but… I’m not going down that rabbit hole). 

The Doc was known unofficially as “Doctor McSleazy” at St. Dominic.  But since at this point, I still didn’t know about him, I’ll hold back on the name for just a little longer. I saw a stewardess, and it didn’t take, and I met a wonderful, sweet woman named Kim. To my mind, there still wasn’t any cheating… Amanda had been the one to demand the “do our own thing” stuff, had been the first to act on it… and I had allowed it. This is not cheating. But I did not know about the guy Amanda had been seeing for two years at this time in a relationship that caused the whole mess.

Her own thing was shocking, absolutely shocking… but it wasn’t my business anymore. But it wouldn’t be too much longer before I found out that yeah…cheating was a big thing with her, the “doing our own thing” business was an effect of it…and actually staged…by her and her secret boyfriend she’d been seeing!

Things got very, very strange, holding our fake life as real on facebook and to friends and family.  We took a trip with some actual friends and hid the whole situation while with them; that was very tense ridiculously tense. It all became unbearable, the fakeness.  Amanda was strange.  She would go from picking out the shoes I should wear and commenting on my attire for a date, to glaring at me and being awful.  All the while dating “Jeff”, and God-Knows-Who…including the Doctor.  I could not understand it.  I could not bear any of it.  It was an unnatural situation. It was horrible.  So January of 2020… I took my ring off.  Separation was the idea.

Was it the end?  I don’t know.  To this day, Kim rightfully holds it against me that I told her I would not divorce my wife and ruin my family, or ruin her academic career.  I was an idiot.

From my end, I let Amanda know it was a separation.  There were conversations, and the conversations ended in the negative… “I don’t think there’s a chance” “You’ll be fine without me” on and on.  It was a very confusing time. But it was also clear, the reason I took off my ring, and it revolved around Amanda and her awful behaviors.  (there’s still soooo much more I wish I could say. About Brian and the Cruise to Hell.  Dustin and KIK messenger.  Justin. A guy named Greg.  A one-legged guy and an overweight electrician.  A guy old enough to be my dad.  The significance of the number 28. So much more.  But that is still for another day.  Suffice it to say there were some awful behaviors from her, most of which I hid from everyone, even then)

And I say, her answer to me taking off my ring…. Was not to attempt any real change.  It was to go plan divorce. Immediately. Within a day, she given me her notes where she’d written out divorce plans. Within a couple of weeks, she’d started reading “Mom’s House, Dad’s House” about how to be divorced.  A few weeks after that, she got a lawyer. She also went on a “camping” trip with Scarlet/Brian and Dustin/Cassie and a suitcase full of lingerie. Continued seeing Jeff and secretly Doc McSleazy. Wilded out with a bunch of friends that will only be known in the forbidden story. This paragraph…we won’t continue for now as this part is reserved for another fact check later, on her “I was blindsided by a Divorce” lie.

So She only offered up change one day, very early on…too early for the changes to be real; in February…when we had just split at the end of January…  and I was correct to think it was fake, because soon, I found out the only time she offered to change, was the day after her Doctor boyfriend broke up with her. 

We are getting there.

So let’s briefly talk about the end and the cheating to end all cheating. I’ll address some of this stuff later in another post… but after I took off my ring, she had quickly hired Judy Barnett to be her divorce attorney.  By this time, as in most of our relationship, she’d convinced me that the dissolution was all my fault. So there was one lawyer, hers… and I had stated and was prepared to give her anything she wanted, except alimony.  I even offered to move out and eat ramen so she would be taken care of.  By this time, she’d stopped with jeff, was in some weird place with the doctor (still unbeknownst to me) and was seeing this guy David, from Gonzales Louisiana. 

But things changed drastically, just a mere couple of days before the unfavorable divorce was final.  I got a random text message…

From the Doctors wife.  Here are some of the things she sent to me.  Most of the things she sent are not admissible here, there is much more…but they are pornographic. And from HIS phone. That’s his wife taking pictures of HIS phone.

Amanda tried to tell everyone the pictures were me/ my phone, but that does not make sense on a number of levels. One, when you see a hand, it’s feminine. Two. She’s referred to as “Amanda Carter, Pacu, St. D” not “Amanda” or “wife”. Three… this guy is in the pictures! Why would I have this guys picture? And she’s in the pictures with him! Four. There is a picture there with him and her in my bed (this picture will surface again later, because the date is significant) and the guy in the pictures firstly, doesn’t have my face, and secondly doesn’t have my tattoos. Five: I do not, and never had service with verizon.

There are so many inconsistencies with her story.

She also claims that I was cheating, and points to Kim as proof. The dates are before I even met Kim, and that is verifiable, easily. We met on bumble. Amanda also claims she was mistreated somehow… and this is easy to prove, and will be the subject of a later fact-check.

And here are my tattoos that I’ve had since 2013. Unless I somehow took them off and hung them up somewhere, it’s definitely not me in the photo above, even if we ignore the fact that I was with our children in another state, and if we ignore the fact that he literally does not have my face.

And it was a long term, ongoing thing… in one text she’s asking him if he deleted the stuff from “before”… It’s a rabbit hole.

So that’s when I found out she’d been seeing Doctor Kori McDaniel, a father of two kids, and a married internist at St. Dominic and she’d been having an affair with him for two years.  That’s when I found out he had been at my house, in my bed many times.  In my shower. That’s when I found out that smack in the middle of our “renaissance” they were “breaking the sink” in bathrooms at St. Dominic.  That’s when I found out that being “on call” was often… something entirely different.  That’s when I found out that the reason my wife would not go on family trips with her own kids and myself… was not because she “had to study” but because those were excellent opportunities to have him over without interruption, as these two pictures show (note the dates.  I was with the kids in Millport Alabama visiting family; she was at home “studying”):

And that’s when I found out that even small things… like avoiding going to Ice’s Corner with us for Ice Cream… had nothing to do with lactose intolerance or needing to study as the excuse was… but was rather it was a good time to take pictures in costume and without… for Kori. And oh my god, the evil I saw in those messages, everything from stealing money from the family, to faking on call, to sitting in her lawyers office trying to frame me for cheating and talking to her boyfriend at the same time over text as seen here….

She also quit going to the gym at the same time she started with him… claiming I “took too long to get ready” and started gyming for 3 hours a day, every day she was home from work. Even leaving to the “gym” when my parents were visiting us!!!! (and oh boy, I’ve seen the pictures. We can’t post them. Actually, there’s a ton more pictures that I can’t post, everything from costumes and nakedness, to things crammed in… well, wherever things could be … gaaah. I can’t even say it here. )

It was just awful. I don’t know if we’ll get into the awfulness, maybe in another post, or several. Things such as waxing her for a year… and finding out later that her obsession and demanding it every two weeks was because her boyfriend liked it.  Or the breast enhancement that cost us $7500 for her “confidence” but was actually a request from him…

Or her constant riding me to mop the house…because he was coming over…

So… to polish it off, here’s a couple of more things:

She claims I was cheating on her with Kim. Here’s her wholeheartedly endorsing her. Not very much in line with cheating allegations, right?

If we need more proof… here’s a bunch of her admitting to it. Now, here’s where I seem like a bit of a jerk. She constantly apologizes. Says she’s remorseful. I reject it, and come across as an as*hole. Of course, as you’ll see in later posts, those types of conversations haven’t happened in a year or two. But answer me this…

How can you feel sorry, and be remorseful if you continue to lie to everyone and tell everyone YOU were wronged? Garnering pity as a victim… These two things cannot exist at the same time.

Since I’ve had a history of being lied to, manipulated and tricked… I would say it’s a ploy to keep me quiet, and get me to “give over” and let her have her way. I mean… if you’re a rapist, or a mugger, what situation could be more advantageous that to get your victim to drop it? Or even befriend you?

Word’s don’t match the actions, and words are cheap.

It’s the same game she’s played with me for years. She’ll do something, come back to me with “i’m sorry. My bad. It’s NBD bruh”

I’d let it go. And she’d do the same thing again, or in most cases… worse things. Over and over. The same exact thing. “I’m sorry”, then I’m supposed to let it go, give over whatever she wants… and she can keep reaping benefits off of the lies in the background. Also, notice I gave her a name in my phone. This conversation was over two years ago, before the divorce. I admit it was juvenile. But wow, what a ride I’d been taking on. The sacrifices I’d put in. The pain. I had just found out the extent of the cheating. Why everything had to hurt for years. I had also just seen on Facebook the vicious rumors and garbage being spread. (I’ll show some of this later in another fact check)

I was extremely angry. But anyways, here’s her admitting to it, or what passes as and admission in her world “Ideally things wouldn’t have happened”:

The thing is, I’ve been quiet on this for two years, and she has run with it. We have been in court the whole time. Not the court with a judge and polished wood everywhere… but the proverbial “court of public opinion” and I have raised no defense until now. The fact is, I’ve been mostly quiet despite her rantings.

Keeping to myself and living my life. I would have stayed quiet forever and it would have been easy to accomplish… if … instead of lying through her teeth to get “victim” status.. she had just… been quiet too. “We grew apart”. We “became different people”… whatever, there’s a million different ways to explain a divorce without intentional fabrications. I never expected her to broadcast her sins. Silence was enough. But it is impossible.

Am I mad or bitter about the divorce? No. I am thankful that I got away. And sometimes people just don’t make it. Divorce is a normal thing in the world. But I am bitter about cruelty, lies. manipulations, selfishness, debauchery and abuse. I’m bitter about wasting my life and my time. I’m wrecked by how badly I bent and contorted myself to try to keep it all floating. I’m annoyed by a lot of things. I wouldn’t go back into that situation with her at gunpoint, and I regret having ever met her. But I’ve been quiet, following the rules, living my life, and trying to be a good person.

I’m not sitting here, two years later, hurling angry speech in jealousy or something like that. I’m simply tired of the lies. I’m tired of her leveraging “victim status” to get her way in life, when there are REAL victims in the world. I’m tired of things being said “to other people” in front of my kids to passively get around the divorce clauses. Tired of her benefitting from the lies. And I have the right to defend myself.

But there you have it…

The true story of the cheating.  I do apologize for… all of this writing… but there is a whole world to cover when it comes to Amanda Carter and cheating.  The fact check is checked. She wasn’t being cheated on, she had staged a situation; pushed things into that direction.  Tried to push me to the edge of a divorce and hold things there until she was ready to bail…and then be able to make accusations.  She was setting up the stage, and I was a trusting idiot…standing wherever she pointed.

She had cheated more than anyone I’d ever known.  I had met one girl that didn’t go anywhere, and was seeing one that was.  Doing exactly what she’d asked me to do. After she’d stated she could not be happy any other way.  And I’d only been seeing Kim for a couple of months, maybe three,  when Amanda moved planning into execution and filed for divorce (which has it’s own post coming, because she told everyone she was blindsided)… Just a couple of months, when she’d been seeing this doctor for years before even broaching the subject of “doing our own thing” on top of the years and years of cheating that I’d already written off!!!!

But she’s got the gall to go and tell every single person that will listen… she was a victim, she was cheated on!  If it wasn’t such serious business, it would be comical.

It’s nuts. And so I’m ending this post. Fact Checked.